In The Kitchen with Aaron Sarlo: Mercury Toast Crunch

It’s that time of year again, GoddammitLarryember! It’s that time of year you think is named after the Spanish verb for ‘to wash,’ but is really named after the commonplace practice of yelling, “GODDAMMIT, LARRY!!” because it’s so fucking hot outside all the time. I mean… honestly… Have your nipples ever sweated this much? I…

Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*

It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: the moon got some of that government money. Also, horoscopes! * Aquarius: Aquarius, if the song can be trusted, your age dawned it the 1960s with a bunch of stinky hippies. We have no reason to doubt pop music. Why would the 5th Dimension lie to us…