It’s a full moon, so you know what that means: the moon has probably been the one taking your lunch at work. Also, horoscopes! * Aquarius: You will more than likely not die this month, Aquarius. Notice how I said “likely”. The stars only know so much, but you can count on them to guide you, nonetheless….
Tag: lies
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
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Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes
It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: slather on that moonscreen. Also, horoscopes! * Aquarius: You’ve made it this far Aquarius (if not, shouldn’t you be haunting somewhere instead of reading horoscopes?) and that’s an accomplishment. We both know you have no idea how you did. Just keep on keeping on. This month…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: the moon sees all! Also, horoscopes! * Aquarius: I’m not going to say that all of this political strife is your fault Aquarius, but there are photos of someone who looks a lot like you standing on the grassy knoll. Maybe it was your doppelganger. The…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: the moon made bail and is out on the streets again. Also, horoscopes!* Aquarius: Do you remember when you found out George Michael was gay? Of course, you don’t! It is besides the point. Wham! Is still Wham! Don’t get caught up in the unimportant details…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: the moon isn’t sick (or at least is asymptomatic) and showed up to work. Also, horoscopes!* Aquarius: Mercury is such a funny little planet. So hot on one side, yet so cold on the other. (Sort of like a McDLT). But this month it is giving…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s the full moon, so you know what that means: more moon for your buck! Also, horoscopes!* Aquarius: Bibliophilia is the love of books, and that is you this month. Good thing since you can’t go anywhere. Hopefully you stocked up on books or one of those screen thingies. Also, a very good thing you learned…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s the full moon closest to Daylight Savings Time, so you know what that means: the farmers have won again. Also, horoscopes!* Aquarius: This is the month you get to binge on carbs. Fat Tuesday ain’t got a thing on Fat April. (The month, not your friend April, she’s not fat btw, the term is morbidly…
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes*
It’s a full moon so you know what that means, the monthly swallowing and regurgitation of the moon by the giant sky dragon has entered the regurgitation phase AND it’s time to see what the stars and planets have in store for you! Aquarius: This month is a great time to learn to play the bagpipe….
Crazy Ron’s Discount Horoscopes by Ron*
Aquarius: That Hall and Oates tribute band you are seeing might actually be Hall and Oates. If they can do it, you can too! Grow a mustache and form a band. Just don’t be a country act, the planets HATE country acts. Pisces: Expect some unfortunate medical news with the only cure being an all candy corn…